State of the Organization and Chairman's Message

Report from the Chairman of the Board of Trustees, Larry Richman
Delivered Saturday, September 16, 2006 at the 15th Annual Evergreen conference

As is tradition at this awards dinner, the Chairman of the Board of Trustees gives a State of the Organization message to give an accounting of what has happened the past year and also to provide a Chairman’s Message.

Evergreen Organization

As you may know, Evergreen is governed by a Board of Trustees which has fiduciary and oversight responsibility to ensure the organization’s goals and objectives are carried out according to the Mission Statement. Trustees serve without compensation. Let me introduce the Trustees to you:

I am the Chairman of the Board
Julie Haws is the Vice-Chairman
The two of us, plus Bruce Bingham form the Executive Committee
Lori Clayburn is the Secretary

The remainder of the Trustees are

Lee Chambers
Dr. Shirley E. Cox
Vera E. Eccles
David Grimley
Elder L. Lionel Kendrick
Elder James O. Mason
Dr. Janet S. Scharman

Evergreen also has two employees:

David Pruden (the Executive Director) and
Rebekah Mohr (the Office Manager)

Evergreen Priorities

The Board of Trustees keeps Evergreen’s efforts focused on three priorities: (1) being a referral service, (2) developing resources, and (3) providing education. I’ll give a brief overview of our activities in these three areas:

1. Referral service

§ We maintain a network of therapists and affiliate groups to whom we can refer people for help. Over the years, we have developed the world’s largest database of this kind, with information on hundreds of therapists who have specific training in same-sex attraction, LDS Family Services agencies, growth and accountability groups, and other organizations that can help.

§ We answer over 300 phone calls and e-mail messages each month.

§ We nurture and provide help to growth and accountability groups. We now have 34 active groups, with another 9 beginning to form. We are pleased to announce that we have recently reached an agreement with LDS Family Services to assist with many of these groups. We also have various online groups in English and other languages.

§ The Evergreen Web site has been used by nearly 200,000 visitors who have viewed well over a million pages. Some of the site is now available in languages and we are in the process of translating it into more languages.

2. Resources

§ We publish a quarterly newsletter, which you can get on paper or by e-mail. There is also a monthly e-mail list you can sign up for, and we’ll keep you informed about additions to the Web site, new products in the bookstore, announcements of events, and major news events about same-sex attraction.

§ We maintain a library at the headquarters office, which you are welcome to use. It has nearly 500 books, articles, research papers, and audiovisual materials.

§ We provide information packets upon request.

§ We also maintain relationships with other community and faith-based organizations.

3. Education

§ This is our 16^th annual conference, which have been attended by nearly 6,000 people. The conferences have included major addresses by 11 general authorities, numerous world-renowned speakers, and hundreds of workshops.

§ Every year, we hold firesides and training meetings.

§ We maintain close relations with Church leaders and provide training to local leaders upon request.

§ We encourage therapist training and development and have directly trained hundreds of therapists.

§ This year, Evergreen intends to step up the pace in educating the general membership of the Church and the public. You’ll see us more prominent in the media telling our story that there are positive ways to respond to same-sex attraction. Today, we live in an evil world where Satan has captured the hearts, minds, and values of many people. His lie is that you are born gay, that this is your true identity, and not that you are a child of God with the power to overcome homosexual behavior and live the gospel of Jesus Christ. We need to be stronger than ever to choose wisely, and teach wisely, in a world where people “call evil good, and good evil” (2 Nephi 15:20). True to our previous policies, we intend to stay out of political, legislative, and social issues. But we intend to tell our story more prominently. If any of you have a story you could tell in a newspaper or magazine article, please let us know and we’ll help you get it published.

We need your help

How can you help accomplish Evergreen’s mission? Let me mention just a few ideas.

Financial support

Like any non-profit organization, we have to beg for money. We have a few large donors, but we really rely on medium and small donations from people just like you. You can make one-time donations, set up monthly contributions by direct deposit, or indicate “Evergreen International” on your United Way donation form with your employer. Your employer may even match your contributions or make a contribution themselves. You can donate appreciated stock and avoid paying capital gains tax. You can even leave assets to the organization in your will.

Volunteer

We can always use volunteers at the office and in each of the growth and accountability groups.

Speak Up

Another way you can help is to be fearless in speaking up on the subject of same-sex attraction. We are concerned that many people don’t understand the issues surrounding same-sex attraction. As I mentioned a moment ago, all most people hear is the propaganda in the media and they don’t understand same-sex attraction in the context of the gospel. Sadly, some lose their testimonies of the gospel over it. Please use any chance you get to correct any misunderstandings of people around you. Ask your ward or stake if they’d like some training.

Faith and prayers

A final way to help is in your faith and prayers, which have an amazing effect on how this work moves forward. We believe that God wants this work to move forward and that He will bless us as we are ready to make things happen. As an organization, we commit to follow the direction of His prophet without exception.

Chairman’s Message

The Journey

I admire those of you who struggle with tremendous challenges. Some of you have same-sex attractions and others are here to try to understand and help someone else. I know it’s not easy. But I also know that the fight is worth it.

I also know that it will be more difficult if you let it totally consume you. Some people “consider feelings of same-gender attraction to be the defining fact of their existence… People can adopt a characteristic as the defining example of their existence… [But w]e have the agency to choose which characteristics will define us; those choices are not thrust upon us.” Is our ultimate defining fact that we experience same-sex attraction or it it that “we are children of Heavenly Parents, born on this earth for a purpose, and born with a divine destiny[?] Whenever any [other] notion…gets in the way of that ultimate defining fact, then it is destructive and it leads us down the wrong path. (Dallin H. Oaks, Same-Gender Attraction, newsroom.lds.org).

We came to life and each of us “have trials to face because our Heavenly Father loves us. His purpose is to help us qualify for the blessing of living with Him and His Son, Jesus Christ, forever in glory and in families. To qualify for that gift we had to receive a mortal body. With that mortality we understood that we would be tested by temptations and by difficulties." (Henry B. Eyring, "In the Strength of the Lord," Ensign, May 2004, 16)

We need faith in our divine nature and in Jesus Christ to endure to the end. We all have different trials. In Christ’s day, His apostles choose to follow Him, but it wasn’t easy. Paul had a thorn in his side his whole life. Peter denounced the Christ out of fear. When the apostles were in the boat, they said “Master carest thou not that we perish?” (Mark 4: 38). He does care, but that doesn’t mean He will withhold from us trials and tribulations that we need.

After working through issues of same-sex attraction, you won’t be the same person "because the Atonement of Jesus Christ is real. And the promise is real that we can become new, changed, and better. And we can become stronger for the tests of life. We then go in the strength of the Lord, a strength developed in His service. He goes with us. And in time we become His tested and strengthened disciples." (Elder Henry B. Eyring, "In the Strength of the Lord," Ensign, May 2004, 19)

"Don't become weary in doing good. If we are patient, we can experience the change of heart we seek. For most of us this will require only a slight change of course, sending us toward true north. The adjustments we must make are in those 'small things,' but that does not mean they are easy. Too many forces are confusing our compass. But the pull to the polar star is one we recognize. It is the direction toward home." (Sister Kathleen H. Hughes, "Out of Small Things," Ensign, November 2004, 111)

What will be the outcome?

So what is going to be the result for you of “working through same-sex attraction?” I don’t know. For some of you, it means that you will figure out why you have the attractions, what you’re lacking, and you’ll find ways to legitimately fill those needs. The attractions will diminish to the point that they won’t get in the way of moving on with your life, marrying, and raising a family. That is the experience of many people I know. For others, it may be something less than that ideal. But in the eternal sense, it really doesn’t matter what the outcome is today. What matters is the process. The purpose of our struggles is for the growth we achieve by going through the struggles.

Elder Boyd K. Packer tells us that same-gender attraction “may be a struggle from which you will not be free in this life.” But he also tells us “If you do not act on temptations, you need feel no guilt. They may be extremely difficult to resist. But that is better than to yield and bring disappointment and unhappiness to you and those who love you. Some think that God created them with overpowering, unnatural desires, that they are trapped and not responsible (see James 1:13–15). That is not true. It cannot be true. Even if they were to accept it as true, they must remember that He can cure and He can heal (see Alma 7:10–13; Alma 15:8).” (Boyd K. Packer, “Ye Are the Temple of God,” Ensign, Nov. 2000, 72)

What if I can't marry in this life?

What if you don’t feel you will marry in this life? Does that mean you might just as well give up and live a gay life? Elder Richard G. Scott reminds those who are single and don’t have an immediate prospect for celestial marriage, that they should “live for it. Pray for it. Expect it in the timetable of the Lord. Do not compromise your standards in any way that would rule out that blessing on this or the other side of the veil” (“Receive the Temple Blessings,” Liahona, July 1999, 31).

There are many people who won’t marry in life because of physical, emotional, or other conditions—including same-sex attraction for some. Elder Lance B. Wickman explains that he has a handicapped daughter. He says, “She’s a beautiful girl. She’ll be 27 next week. Her name is Courtney. Courtney will never marry in this life, yet she looks wistfully upon those who do. She will stand at the window of my office which overlooks the Salt Lake Temple and look at the brides and their new husbands as they’re having their pictures taken. She’s at once captivated by it and saddened because Courtney understands that will not be her experience here. Courtney didn’t ask for the circumstances into which she was born in this life, any more than somebody with same-gender attraction did. So there are lots of kinds of anguish people can have, even associated with just this matter of marriage. What we look forward to, and the great promise of the gospel, is that whatever our inclinations are here, whatever our shortcomings are here, whatever the hindrances to our enjoying a fullness of joy here, we have the Lord’s assurance for every one of us that those in due course will be removed. We just need to remain faithful.” (Lance B. Wickman, Same-Gender Attraction: What if I can't marry?, http://www.lds.org/newsroom/issues/answer/0,19491,6056-1-202-4-202,00.html)

Stay true and strong

President James E. Faust said, "So where should each of us make our stand? As we demonstrate our devotion to God by our daily acts of righteousness, He can know where we stand. For all of us this life is a time of sifting and refining. We all face trials. Individual members in the early days of the Church were tested and refined when they had to decide if they had the faith . . . to put their belongings in a wagon or a pioneer handcart and travel across the American plains. Some did not have the faith. Those who did traveled 'with faith in every footstep.' In our time we are going through an increasingly difficult time of refining and testing. The tests are more subtle because the lines between good and evil are being eroded. Very little seems to be sacred in any of our public communication. In this environment we will need to make sure where we stand all of the time in our commitment to eternal truths and covenants." (James E. Faust, "Where Do I Make My Stand?" Ensign, Nov. 2004, 21)

"Most of us don’t mind doing what we ought to do when it doesn’t interfere with what we want to do, but it takes discipline and maturity to do what we ought to do whether we want to or not. (Joseph B. Wirthlin, “Let Every Man Learn His Duty,” Ensign, Nov. 1980, 69)

"The Lord has promised us that as we 'search diligently, pray always, and be believing, . . . all things [will] work together for [our] good' (D&C 90:24). That doesn't mean that everything will be perfect or that we will not have any trials, but it does mean that everything will be okay if we just 'hang in there.' Ours is the opportunity to 'be . . . an example of the believers' (1 Timothy 4:12), and the Savior has promised that 'all things are possible to him that believeth' (Mark 9:23). So believe in yourselves. Believe that you are never alone. Believe that you will always be guided." (Elaine S. Dalton, "Believe!" Ensign, May 2004, 110)

Elder Jeffrey R. Holland taught us that a "reliance upon the merciful nature of God is at the very center of the gospel Christ taught.” He said, “I testify that the Savior's Atonement lifts from us not only the burden of our sins but also the burden of our disappointments and sorrows, our heartaches and our despair (see Alma 7:11-12). From the beginning, trust in such help was to give us both a reason and a way to improve, an incentive to lay down our burdens and take up our salvation. There can and will be plenty of difficulties in life. Nevertheless, the soul that comes unto Christ, who knows His voice and strives to do as He did, finds a strength, as the hymn says, 'beyond [his] own' ("Lord, I Would Follow Thee," Hymns, no. 220). The Savior reminds us that He has 'graven [us] upon the palms of [His] hands' (1 Nephi 21:16). Considering the incomprehensible cost of the Crucifixion and Atonement, I promise you He is not going to turn His back on us now. When He says to the poor in spirit, 'Come unto me,' He means He knows the way out and He knows the way up. He knows it because He has walked it. He knows the way because He is the way." ("Broken Things to Mend," Ensign, May 2006, 70-71)

Copyright © 2006 Larry Richman. May be photocopied or shared electronically for noncommercial, educational use as long as it is in its entirety and contains this notice. For more information, see www.Evergreeninternational.org.